Title: Mask of Happiness

why?...why do human beings act the way they do when they kome from such greatness..the greatness inside of all humans..for all humans are made from that which makes space and all inside this space..for human beings are made from elements that do not originate from this planet..rather from stars...stars that have kollided into one another over many many eons ago...stars which the simplest of are compossed of helium and hydrogen and over the course of burning fuel kreate more heavier and heavier elements which then all release when stars explode into gigantik nebulas which form with other stars that have exploded and with this process occuring over and over and over and again kreate the greatness of the parts of humans....but at times i sit and wonder why humans are such as waste...a waste of everything...humans should rather kreate good and do good but instead do the total opposite and kreate pain and suffering and lies and betray...but why...why is it...if i am to be so bold and say that humans are a waste and humans should never have been kreated and to go as far as to damn the humans and i intern damning that whichh kreated humans...if i am then so be it....for as of now i kan not and do not fully respect human beings...why is it that humans are the top of the food chain...hoenstly i don't believe that humans deserve this planet...too much has occured to take away the gift of this planet...the growing case against the human race builds every momment...i sometimes think time and space and all of kreation should start over...fix all of the numerous errors...maybe then people would be happy....so it still kontinues this pain and suffering and tears and loss of weight and unhappyness...it is now a false face a false sense of being...the foundation is barely holding up the weight..it is only a matter of time before this all will collapse...so i question why..why do humans hurt..kause pain onto each other..break promises..make false accusations...have volatile feelings...are so fikle and change their minds...why...why....sometimes wonder if there really is a significant reason to keep on going...why go if there is nothing to look forward to...if all that you once believed to be true no longer exists and was all false to begin with whhy go on if one must live a lie....damn all humans...damn them and their ways...so i sit and think back to earlier times and simpler ways of life and many good thoughths of childhood..but w/ these thoughts of childhood i kan not but overlook the negative...and the times when all was lost....many a time i have dreamed of my own funeral and my own passing...strange to some...morbid for others..but all to true for my own..my own passing yes i have seen it...the mass..the grave...the everything...when a child i was i would thhink that this is the answer...yes this must be the answer....the end justifies the means right?!!....RIGHT?!?!...but as i grew i realized that it was not the answer...but still remmnents of those thoughts still remain and lerk around every korner...so as humans we all roam aroundd our lives pretending to be something we're not shure of and being things we really don't want and work in places we kould kare less and wonder and dream for something better....but why...why all of this...highly a doubt of mine thtat one kan possibly know the answer to all of these questions or even a speck of the answer..not even an atom of the answer but we all still try..we all still roam around pretending to be things we're not shure of..be things we really don't want to be..and work in places we kould kare less..and we still dream of the life we want....but then reality hits us...ouch we say...what the hell was that..damn that..damn this..damn everyone...i say damn EVERYONE...i say DAMN EVERYONE...but i turn around in the sea of people and realize that no one notices..so i skream hardder and wave my arms around and once again i yell DAMN EVERYONE...i pause...and still no one notices..but why i ask myself...the sea of bodies kontinue to flow around me un phased as to what i am doing...am i really that insignificant...are they soo konsumed at their own beings and lives they don't notice someone kraving for attention...hmm strange...and as i begin to walk against the kurrent one trips me up and as i fall i realize i am being pushed along WITH the flow of everyone else..i try to take hold and stop this..for this is the last thing i want..i would rather be dead then to follow everyone else...follow everyone elses false true reality but i am trapped...and there i remain in this false true reality...reality to most is what they kan either touch, smell, taste, smell, or see but there is no doubt another real reality...a true reality but they are unaware of this nor it seems do they kare...strange..and after two decades of flowing w/ the rest of this sea i still believe they do not kare nor notice anything...i have become so jaded that i must pretend myself as to how great this reality is...i have adopted my own mask myself...but deep down inside i dream and yern for a time when i no longer need this mask..this fake mask....one day i tell myself ONE DAY! i will no longer have a need for this mask.




things still suck...but there is no auidible skreaming and pointing
it is now all internal.

a solution i have not found

i wish for simpler times
but this wish i will never recieve.

Edward Munch - The Scream


and inside i skream.
posted by Leon at 10:47 PM